My stomach is in knots
Mom’s absence is deafening
I feel paralyzed, unable to take in this change
So many thoughts and memories from the past
I cannot stop crying
I am grieving already!
The palliative care nurses helped Mom to the commode
Was she fighting to stay stronger for me?
She can now give in to her weakness
I want her to feel safe in her new surroundings
This is so hard!
I was able to protect, in our home
Now, here she feels so far away…
I feel quilt…sadness…anger, and yes sometimes even relief
Watching my Mom fail physically and deteriorate is heart wrenching.
Her life is ending
The reality of her death is now right in front of me, so clearly
I cannot stop crying
I cannot stop crying…
This poem is submitted to One Shot Sunday, hosted by One Stop Poetry. To see other poems based on the prompt, please visit the site.
I feel for anyone who must go through this. "Was she fighting to stay stronger for me?" What a tough question to consider; perhaps impossible to not feel guilty. Emotionally stirring challenge response.
ReplyDeletewhew...that is just what it feels like to see a parent getting old and maybe beginning to slip...i watched my MIL through it..
ReplyDeleteThis photo challenge brought back those raw memories of how difficult it was for me to see my Mother aging. It seems we traded roles back then, where once she cared for me unconditionally, with life's changing tide I was needed to accept the role of caregiver/mother for her. ღ ஆεlεɳa
ReplyDeleteFor me it was my father. The choice is always a knife-edge. It doesn't matter which way you choose, you still get cut. Well written.
ReplyDeletea very emotional and personal take on the prompt...left me with a cramping stomach...
ReplyDeleteEvocative description of a burden that many of us now carry
ReplyDeleteGreat description and heart wrenching.
ReplyDeleteYou did a great job on this one. Emotions run high for me anyway after losing my Mom to cancer a few years ago.. Susie
ReplyDeleteEvocative, emotional piece... touching the depths of longing to make things different, gentler for those we must watch over, caring deeply for the losses they endure.
ReplyDeleteHelen Thank you!
ReplyDeleteEmotional, effective.
ReplyDelete